Is this just a southern thing?
I am called names by strangers every single day and I don’t think twice about it. Here are the most popular names in no particular order:
1. Honey, or Hun 2. Sweetie 3. Darlin 4. Baby 5. Sugar
Older women use these names for anyone younger than they are. Most of the time it’s just a habit, and they don’t even think about it. They’re motherly or grandmotherly words. My mother-in-law uses two of those words all the time.
“Would you like a refill on your sweet tea, Darlin?”
“How ’bout some pie, Hon? We have cherry and chocolate fudge“.
There are a few men who can get away with using these words, but they have to be at least 80 years old. Or blind. Or in a nursing home.
Then we have:
5. Girl 6. Chic 7. Woman 8. Bitch
These names are used by my closest friends and it’s how we greet eachother. ” Hey Woman”! “Hey Bitch“. You know, normal names like that that show affection and respect for one another. “Hey girl” is the most widely used friend greeting. Oh yeah, I have one friend who is Slut. “Hey Slut“! High class stuff.
That’s my husband’s name for me occasionally. Not very creative, but whatever.
“Hey Babe, will you stop and pick up some milk on your way home”?
“Babe, there’s a glare on the tv screen. You gotta turn that light off“.
Everyday. No biggy. My word for him is also “Babe”.
“Babe. No. I told you I have a hemorroid. You cannot come within five feet of my body“.
My favorite liquor store in town is conveniently located right around the corner from where I work. I love how clean and open it is, it’s always well stocked, and most of all, I love how knowledgeable the staff is. Especially the owner. He knows everything about anything that has a drop of alcohol in it, from Moonshine to Pink Rasberry Wine Coolers.
Except. One. Thing.
“Hey Doll. How’re you doing today”?
“You need any help, Doll”?
“Whatcha lookin’ for, Doll?”
Really? Every single time I go in there. The thing is, he’s not creepy. I don’t feel threatened or hit on. He’s a clean cut, respectable looking, business owner in his 40’s. So, why does a guy who looks like he has some sense, think it’s okay to call women, “Doll”?
We were talking about it at work one day, and my co-worker said, “He’s never called me that. But I think my husband is usually with me when I go in there”.
AHA! So he DOES know it’s not cool to say that to a woman! If it was okay, he would say it in front of somebody and their husband or boyfriend.
Yeah, I know I should say something to him. I’m usually fine doing that sort of thing, and I can do it without sounding like a redneck. But for some reason, I haven’t done it yet. It has kept me from wanting to shop there, but dammit, I like the store!
Maybe I just don’t want to be that person. That touchy, too sensitive person that makes a stink out of dumb shit. I know it’s not cool that he says that, and it kinda makes him sound like an asshole…but ok, maybe he’s an asshole.
But I like his store, and if I say anything, it’ll be awkward after that everytime I go in there. He may even do the “Hello there, Is there anything I can help you with today, MAM“? and totally exaggerate the Mam part to make it clear that he’s abiding to my wishes, but obviously thinks I’m overreacting because the fact is, he is still the same asshole.
The word “Doll” conjures up images of womanizers and sexist men from the 50’s and 60’s. Who the hell says “Doll” anymore anyway? If you’re going to be a male chauvenist, at least be in this century and say, “Baby” or one of the names old ladies get to use.
What’s the male equivelant of Doll? I could respond to him with that and maybe he’d get the point without me really “saying” anything.
“Hey, Big Boy, are you all out of those little four-pack bottles of Pinot Grigio”?
“Thanks, HotRod, I’ll let ya know if I have any more questions”.